The Art of Being a [Female] Bandleader

So you love to play music, and you’ve gained some competence, and you also start to write your own music. You ask around and find a few folks who are willing to play your music, but maybe you go to a couple of rehearsals with them, and they’re just not playing your music the way you heard it in your head. What to do?  You may think it’s time to start your own band. But what will that all entail? 

I’ve been a bandleader since I was 16 years old when I walked into St. Peter’s Church in NYC and went right up to Rev Gensel, who was running the All Nite Soul Celebration at the time, and asked him for a gig. Now understand my motivation. I am a flutist, I am a woman, and I love to play jazz. But at the time, no one would hire me. For me, the only plausible explanation was that I wasn’t a doubler, which means I didn’t play the tenor sax or alto sax along with the flute. It never even entered my consciousness that no one would hire me because I was a woman. 

In any case, Rev. Gensel was more than amused and very kindly asked me if I had a band, to which I responded, yes. He then asked if I had music that I could play. Again, I responded, yes. Then he said that I had the gig. I was overjoyed – but outside where he couldn’t see me I was freaking out because I didn’t have a band nor did I have music! “Not to worry,” I said to myself, “I will get a band and compose and learn some music.” And that was exactly what I did!

That began my journey as a bandleader. Since then I’ve had many bands, playing many different styles of music, and I’ve learned much about being a band leader—and about being a female bandleader.  Most of the people in my band have typically been men. likely because there were just more men on the music scene than women, although I have had some women in my band. So my experience as a bandleader, and particularly as a female bandleader, has been one of constant change and some very humorous stories. Here are some “rules” I’ve learned along the way:

1. Learn how to express yourself to your bandmates clearly and assertively in order to not alienate them. Having men in your band involves complicated male/female dynamics that are different from an all-woman band. Basically, the rule is, just treat everyone with respect, including yourself. 

2. If it’s not working out with someone in your band, don’t be afraid to just let them go. After I’ve established my expectations, I give people two chances to mess up. I don’t wait a third time; that’s valuable time wasted. If someone is not respecting you as the bandleader, let them go –but be sure to have a backup plan.  There are always musicians around who will want to play with you if your reputation is intact.

3. A good bandleader is a facilitator of energy rather than one making all the decisions. You encourage band members to offer their ideas and expertise so that they feel cooperative ownership to the music and to the flow of the band.

4. Be very, very clear about all the details of your gig you are offering a musician so they can make up their minds about accepting. Follow through with everything–the time, the place, the music, the dress code, and the money. Each musician is his/her own entity of business, so be respectful by supplying all the details.

5. Pay your musicians before they go on stage. I can guarantee you the music will be better. The musicians will feel respected, and it eliminates any doubt that they will be paid. Once you’ve established yourself as an honest and trustworthy bandleader, your reputation will be shared through the grapevine, and people will want to play with you.

6. Allow your musicians to play their solos as long as reasonably possible. They will appreciate this freedom. Also, feed your musicians. Free food and drink are always appreciated.

All these rules apply to any bandleader. But we women as bandleaders must prove ourselves over and over again.  It’s unfortunate, but it’s a fact. But just do your homework and be the best musician you can possibly be. If you can play and your business is right and you’re getting gigs, you can get the best players around. Some people still will end up not playing with you. But that’s OK, too. Follow your own path, and the right musicians will show up in your band. I can’t tell you how many times that I felt anxiety and fear before asking some remarkable musicians to play with me. I had to work through it, and most of the time, they said yes. Once I developed my reputation as a good player and a dependable leader, I found that I could pretty much call anyone. But attaining the necessary confidence requires a lot of inner work, and that’s imperative to becoming a great musician, a great person, and a great bandleader. 

Honor your passion, honor your talent, persevere, have joy, and know you have a right to play music with anyone, and then have an amazing time leading your band, regardless of your gender. 

By Andrea Brachfeld

Andrea Brachfeld is a flutist, composer, educator, recording artist and band leader with a stellar resume. In 2021, she relocated to her home town of Baltimore from New York, and since then has been performing in Baltimore at Keystone Korner, An die Musik, and other venues in Baltimore as well as in Washington, D.C. and New York City.